Monopoly!: Microsoft Office Edition

My brother, lucky him, received a new laptop for his “spicy sixteen,” which just happened to come with Microsoft Office 2007 Student Edition. Due to the fact that I was still plugging away with Word 2000, I decided to install the new version. Oh! Silly me, you need an activation code to use any Microsoft product. And oh! Silly me, again, my brother already used the activation code. Oh darn. So I wouldn’t be able to use fancy Word 2007. At least I could go back to good ol’ Word 2000 right? WRONG! Apparently the installation of Office 2007 had erased the presence of all other Office programs from my computer. (That’s Word, Powerpoint, Excel, and Outlook, for those who are wondering. Lucky me, I still have Office Express. I love the world.)

Now, stuck with no Word, and no Powerpoint, both of which are required for my school documents, I decided to look online and see if I could buy a cheap copy of each. It would’ve been nice to simply reinstall, but not only were my Office reinstall disks non-existent (I didn’t order my computer from a company, rather, from a private retailer), but doubtless they would not have worked even had they existed. I had already used the activation code once and therefore could not do so again. So I looked online. As might logically have been expected, there were no free downloads of Word (except for a 60 day trial, which is utterly useless), surprisingly, not even of an older version. Then I looked at prices.

You’ve got to be kidding me. Versions 2003 costs twice as much as a 2007, which my computer can’t run reliably anyway because it isn’t Vista. Even despite that, why should I have to pay at all? (or rather, my parents) The computer was paid for in full, as was my brother’s. I tried to use his software, and end up getting mine removed? And then to retrieve it, another access code must be paid for? Yet I really have no choice: either buy a version of Office to replace what I’ve lost, or explain to my teachers why I can’t view my Open-Source alternative documents on the school computer and therefore can do no more assignments.

Which brings me back to the trust issue. Coincidentally, the day after the incident, I had to squirm and fidget my way through an APUSH discussion/lecture about the Gilded Age, and, you guessed it, the robber barons. Every word spoken during those 41 minutes made my eyes twitch. “Monopoly.” “Eliminate the competition.” “Make their product the only one available so as to drive prices artificially high.” “Fabulous wealth for those in control, while the bottom was destitute.” At one point, I could stand it no longer and yelled “MICROSOFT!!!” at which my teacher arched his eyebrows, nodded imperceptibly, and continued speaking. This, of course, is likely due to the fact that he was recently concussed, as he would normally have led us on a rest-of-class-period-long-tangent about the Microsoft monopoly. But I digress.

As I wind down on my rant, I wait fervently for my download of Open Office to finish. It is an open-source alternative to Microsoft Office, and even if the school doesn’t quite accept it as a legitimate way for me to do my homework, at least I can say I stuck my tongue out at the monopoly of Microsoft. ‘Cause after all, Open Office is completely free!